Fault

I have been trying to figure this out for quite some time. And I am sure I am still figuring it out. It is defined as “a defect or imperfection; flaw; failing.” But by “figuring out” I simply mean, being aware of myself, my actions, the moments when I stumble, the moments when I trip others, the times that I spend thinking about what happened.

And now I have realized my greatest fault yet. And yet if I spoke of it, wrote of it, I would only be doing it again.

That thing I do.

It isn’t all about me. It’s about you. And then us.

And if I apologize now I am only doing it again. But I am, sorry. 

Turning things sideways, upside down, not telling the truth. And then thinking that when I do, someone is expected to listen. That they will believe me, this time.

I was always the girl who cried wolf. The thing is I never stopped being it. I never admitted to it. And now here I am. Call me out. Cause now I can handle it.

And now that I know, I promise to do better, better for you who are reading this.