(Re)Vision Plan

This is the follow-up assignment: March 18th, 2012

Two months ago I landed in Ghana. Two months ago I had no idea what was going to happen next, I only knew that my first step was forward, off the plane and into a new country. From that moment I have continued to take steps forward, learning about Ghana, learning about myself, learning about the differences and similarities that exist between and within cultures. Not all of the steps have been easy to take, some require more effort, some require more reflection, and some require a little push. Having this time to write, to understand why those steps are not always easy to take, has been more beneficial to me than I could have imagined. Reflecting back on my vision plan that I wrote at the beginning of the semester to now, I am able to see what I have been able to accomplish and assess the reasons why. The factors that I think have affected my ability to reach these goals are the “intensity factors” that students experience when they are abroad in another country, also called “cross-cultural stress factors.”

I think the factor that is having the greatest impact on me is “status.” Teaching in the nursery and teaching at Tot To Teen has been more stressful than I would like to admit. I have been trying to understand why and I think this stress factor may offer the explanation I have been looking for. As a white American girl I have been given a pedestal and am standing on top of it, at least that’s how it feels. That’s how it feels when Grandma tells me that she has called one of the parents of the nursery school kids, who was not there, to tell her that the white lady was teaching today. That’s how it feels when I am given a class of thirty-six students and am expected to be able to teach without having a college degree. My skin color and where I am from has portrayed a status that I am not comfortable having. It is as if qualifications do not matter because I am a white American and therefore I have all the answers, already know the best or the better way of teaching.

I never thought that this would be the case before coming to Ghana. I knew that my skin color would be different; that I would stand out from the majority, but I did not know what status it would give me. Now that I have been given this status I have had to think about things differently, act differently, and deal with the emotional stress that has come along with it. Part of my cognitive adaptation has been to think about what I can do to help the students the most while I am teaching them. Since I have not been given any guidance on what to do, I have had to think about what to teach to the nursery school students and have also had to consider how to discipline in both the nursery and the school. I have had to take the mental stance of a teacher. And thus I have also had to act like one. This means that even when I do not know what to do in the classroom I have had to act like I do. This can be mentally stressful, as I feel unprepared for what might happen in any given day. However, I am learning more about myself in the process and realizing that I have the ability to do so much with these students, that I do have a lot to teach.

Another factor that is affecting me is “expectation.” I think that this has created stress for me as I have high expectations of myself and I have found it difficult to do work effectively right away in this new culture. I did not expect this to affect me before I came to Ghana but I am slowly realizing that part of the cultural stress I am experiencing is due to the high expectations I have of myself and the inability to live up to these expectations at the moment. I think this is due to the difficulty in navigating a new culture, the time it takes to learn and understand things, and the frustrations that come along with lack of power or water living in a hot climate. Or perhaps these are excuses. I am mentally trying to prepare myself by focusing on getting things done by a certain time but I am also realizing that perhaps my expectations of myself are too high right now. Perhaps I am trying to do too much and need to slow down. But then there is a part of me that wants to keep pushing, to keep trying. This is the part of me that is concerned with sending pen pal letters, to teaching in the nursery, to starting my multimedia project, to celebrating birthdays, and to learning in all my classes.

(Re)Vision Plan

After reading my initial vision plan I can see where these factors have affected my pursuit of the goals I set for myself in the beginning of the semester. The four goals I had set for myself are to: (1) bridge the gap between perceptions of Africa and America, (2) work with the Ghanaian education system, (3) make a Ghanaian friend, and (4) learn Twi. Looking back at these goals in relation to the factors I have identified previously I think I need to revise the explanations that I gave. I think I also need to make sure I am still moving forward, pushing myself to take the next steps.

The first goal that I have is to bridge the gap between perceptions of Africa and America. I think that I am accomplishing this through my blog but I also wanted to do something bigger. I applied for and received a scholarship to do a multimedia project on the 38 CIEE students and the role that education plays in our development as well as in the development of Ghana. I am finding it difficult to get this project off the ground and part of the stress is due to the expectations I have of myself. I am now setting goals for myself, having a certain number of students interviewed by a specific time and having an end date. I have only recently begun to worry about this project but I think that if I re-center my focus on this that I will be able to accomplish it effectively.

The second goal that I have is to work with the Ghanaian education system. I think that I am accomplishing this through my work at Tot To Teen and the nursery. I am beginning to understand the education system and how the students learn here. I have also added a project to this goal as well – a pen pal program between Tot To Teen and Country Day, a private school in New Orleans.

The third goal is to make a Ghanaian friend. This has been more difficult than I thought it would be. I am becoming friends with the teacher I am working with at Tot To Teen but I am not sure that it is a friendship that will last after I leave. However, I have become closer to two other male Ghanaian friends but I find myself being more reserved and more skeptical. I think that this is due to the “status” that I am associated with, being a white American girl.

The fourth goal is to learn Twi. I have begun to speak it more when I am at the market but I only know short phrases and find it difficult to converse for longer than a few minutes. I am hoping that in the next two months I can learn more but I am unsure whether I will be able to reach the level of conversation that I had originally hoped for. This is one goal that I am willing to revise a little because learning new languages is difficult for me and takes time and patience.

These four goals are still within walking distance, can still be accomplished. I hope that by the end of the next two months I have begun to take my final steps in completing my goals, overcoming the stress of “status” and “expectations.”